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Have you ever noticed how the little things can sometimes trip you up more than anything else? One moment you feel like you’re doing great, then suddenly something knocks you off course and sends you spiraling backward. Why does that happen? It’s often due to our self-talk, to the words we use and the thoughts we harbor. As I get older, I realize more and more how these words have a profound impact on our beliefs, mindset, and ultimately our actions and results.
Put simply, using the wrong words leads to the wrong results. This is something I struggle with, even as a dedicated goal setter working on personal development. Being intentional with our words and thoughts is a constant battle, as old thinking patterns die hard. And it’s a reminder that this is something we all need to continuously work on.
It’s not always easy. Our brains seem hardwired to focus on the negative and look for problems, for self-protection and preservation. We end up telling ourselves things like “I’ll never be able to do it,” “it’s just too hard,” or “I’m always going to be this way.” These words are actually powerful because they shape our beliefs, conscious and subconscious, ultimately impacting our actions and results.
But what if we could change that? What if we were more intentional with our language and self-talk, able to reprogram our subconscious to believe we can achieve our goals? That would be powerful, right? And it’s possible. But first, we need to be more aware – recognizing the words and phrases holding us back in order to change them.
Let’s start by discussing the three most dangerous words in our vocabulary: “I don’t have.” We’ve probably said these words often without realizing it. From “I don’t have enough time” to “I don’t have a good plan,” these words, while they feel true, are simply excuses ingrained in our minds. They are disempowering, taking away our ability to change and making us believe we are stuck with no control over our circumstances.
Truely, while we may not change every circumstance, we always have a choice in how we respond. Changing just one word can make a difference – instead of “I don’t have,” say “I won’t.” Recognizing it as a choice allows us to ask important questions like “why am I choosing this?” and “is this what I really want?” It forces us to examine the fear disguised as excuses and make a new choice, one that acknowledges the fear and takes action in spite of it. Choosing to be brave and believe in ourselves – that’s where the real magic happens.
Access our free video training – The 3 most dangerous words in your vocabulary
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