Children are undeniably adorable, but caring for them can be incredibly stressful. This stress is a shared experience among parents, caregivers, educators, and camp counselors. Despite this commonality, there is a tendency for individuals to compare their levels of stress and challenges in caring for children.
However, a 2013 survey conducted by TODAY Parents and Insight Express shed light on which factors contribute to the highest levels of stress among mothers. The survey, which included responses from 7,164 mothers, revealed some intriguing findings that may finally settle the debate about who has it harder.
The Mom Survey Findings
The survey unveiled several significant findings:
- 46% of moms reported that their husbands or partners caused them more stress than their kids did.
- 72% of moms stressed about their own stress levels.
- 60% of moms found raising girls more stressful than raising boys.
- 9 out of 10 moms were stressed about staying fit and attractive.
- 60% cited the lack of time as the biggest cause of stress.
- Moms of four or more children reported relatively low stress levels, while moms of three children were found to be the most stressed.
Looks Like 3 Is Not the Charm…
What exactly is causing this heightened stress among mothers? According to the survey, 75% of mothers reported being more stressed due to their self-imposed pressure to be perfect and the judgments of other mothers. This self-imposed pressure and fear of judgment seemed to be prevalent and impactful.
“You always hear about the mommy wars, but I feel like we’re judging ourselves more harshly than anyone else,” said Jill Smokler, creator of Scary Mommy. “Going from one to two was an easy, breeze transition. Two to three, everything was turned upside down. I did not feel like I had it together… just crossing the street and not being able to physically hold all their hands I found tremendously stressful.”
Despite the challenges, the average mom reported a stress level of 8.5 on a 10-point scale. Dr. Janet Taylor, a psychiatrist and mother of four, emphasized that this level of stress is normal, particularly as mothers often neglect their own needs, leading to a lack of time for self-care and leisure activities.
“Moms are acutely aware of the fact they do not have the time to take care of their own needs. Forget reading a book, exercising, or fun hobbies. Some moms barely have time to shower,” said Taylor. “There’s just not enough space in your head for perfectionism when you get four or more kids.”
8 Easy and Achievable Tips for Stressed Out Moms
To address and alleviate this stress, there are several manageable tips that mothers can consider:
- Take a lunchtime walk or engage in a workout.
- Treat yourself to a monthly pampering session.
- Host playdates to connect with other mothers.
- Take a day off occasionally.
- Seek out local parent support communities.
- Find healthy escapes, such as reading books in quiet moments.
- Plan a night out with friends.
- Enjoy a soothing hot bath after the kids are in bed.
Ultimately, these tips can provide much-needed relief and self-care to moms, allowing them to prioritize their mental and physical well-being.
Want More Proof? Putting Kids to Bed Earlier Can Help Mom’s Mental Health, Study Says
