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Have you ever wondered what it would be like to be present at your own funeral, fully conscious as your loved ones express their affection and share cherished memories of you? It’s not just a daydream for those who choose to have a living funeral—a unique end-of-life ritual where the person of honor is still very much alive and present to experience their own farewell. While the idea of the living funeral entered the American pop-culture lexicon in 1997, thanks to the bestselling memoir “Tuesdays with Morrie,” stories of people hosting their own living funerals are proliferating around the world.
The resurgence of living funerals is evident in the increasing Google searches for the term, and in cultural references like the Season 11 premiere of the sitcom “Curb Your Enthusiasm,” which featured a living funeral ceremony as its main plot hook. These ceremonies offer an alternative to traditional funerals, enabling the person of honor to take part in commemorating their own life, sharing memories with and expressing their wishes to loved ones. This can empower people to take control over how they are remembered and confront their mortality in a personalized, meaningful way.
The living funeral can take place at any point in life, but in many cases, it is pursued after a terminal diagnosis. The ceremony allows the individual to say goodbye to their loved ones and hear beautiful words from them. Olga Nikolajev, founder of Death Doula Ontario Network, describes the living funeral as a liminal space, a transitional period that can hold deep significance for those involved. The practice of memorializing a person’s life while they are still alive can be traced back to indigenous traditions, which reflect an intrinsic understanding of the continuity of life and death.
The increasing popularity of living funerals is part of the growing death positivity movement, emphasizing the benefits of engaging with death as an intrinsic part of the cycle of life. Living funerals offer psychological benefits, allowing individuals to move more smoothly through the process of grief and loss toward acceptance. While living funerals present opportunities for recognition, healing, and reconciliation with loved ones, they also provide a platform for engaging with the natural process of life’s end.
