When my fiancé proposed last summer, little did I know the whirlwind of wedding planning that lay ahead. Opting for a non-traditional micro-wedding (thanks, Airbnb) was still stressful, driving me to dream of escaping decision-making turmoil in an island paradise miles away. Instead of a couples’ retreat, I embarked on a solo honeymoon in Hawaii. Yes, you read that right. While most couples plan post-wedding honeymoons together, I saw this as an opportunity to reconnect with myself before committing to a lifetime with someone else, and my then-fiancé fully supported me.
The concept of a “solomoon,” or solo honeymoon, felt radical initially, but I knew it would offer a refreshing chance to ground myself and reassess my priorities. According to Morgan Anderson, licensed clinical psychologist and relationship coach, “Taking time for a solomoon sets the tone for a marriage where both individuals prioritize themselves. Self-care isn’t selfish; it benefits your marriage too.”
Surprisingly, my solo Hawaiian escape before our wedding transformed me beyond my expectations, preparing me to be the best version of myself for my husband. Many shared milestones are celebrated with friends or partners, but a solomoon is a unique pre- or post-wedding retreat dedicated solely to self-discovery. It’s an opportunity to pause, reflect, and ensure you’re bringing your best self into your new marriage.
Despite skepticism about the concept of solo honeymoons, research shows that spending time alone can reduce stress and foster personal growth. A solomoon communicates a healthy marriage culture where individual needs can coexist with shared life goals. In Hawaii, my journey of self-care involved private yoga, invigorating hikes, and transformative mindset coaching at Sensei Lānaʻi resort.
While initially daunting, traveling alone tested my resilience and forced me to confront challenges head-on, ultimately enhancing my self-awareness and self-reliance. My time in Hawaii taught me that self-care isn’t just about relaxation; it’s a powerful tool for building a strong relationship. By nurturing my own identity, I discovered that I could bring my best self to our marriage.
