Content Warning: This story discusses eating disorder recovery, which may be disturbing to some readers. The writer shares their personal experience with orthorexia recovery and their relationship with movement. It is important to consult with a healthcare professional before restarting exercise in your own recovery journey.
I remember my first time exercising outside of mandatory phys-ed classes—a 6 a.m. spin class after high school. My parents, who were gym enthusiasts, encouraged me to join. Despite initial reluctance, I pushed myself to please the instructor. However, I soon realized spin classes were not for me. Following this experience, comments about my weight gain began to affect me, leading to a struggle with orthorexia.
After a long recovery journey, I learned to let go of controlling my body’s appearance. But restarting movement without that motivation was challenging. It was difficult to establish a consistent routine. I realized that I viewed exercise as punishment during my eating disorder, leading me to subconsciously resist it.
It took time for me to reshape my relationship with movement. I now prioritize enjoying activities such as walks with friends and dancing in the kitchen. It’s a liberating feeling to engage in movement without guilt or pressure to meet certain standards.
It is crucial to choose movement that aligns with the life you want to lead post-recovery. Reflect on activities that bring you joy and support your overall well-being. Approaching past experiences with movement with compassion can help you navigate any negative associations.
Challenge all-or-nothing thinking related to exercise and remind yourself that movement is a lifelong practice. It’s important to reframe how you view fitness and prioritize self-compassion in your journey. Remember that movement is a part of a healthy lifestyle, regardless of your age or fitness level.
Consulting with a psychologist can be beneficial in addressing any barriers or self-limiting beliefs surrounding exercise. By focusing on enjoyable and sustainable movement, you can create a positive and fulfilling relationship with physical activity post-recovery.
